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How To Be A Kick-Ass Wedding Guest

How To Be A Kick-Ass Wedding Guest

So it happened, eh’? You found out you aren’t the only Manly Brotato getting’ hitched this season, and they want you and yours to be there. Yeah, you might be good for some advice for the future newlyweds (especially if your nuptials have already occurred,) but today’s Manly Monday post isn’t about advice for the Bride and/or Groom.

Today is about being the best wedding guest you can possibly be (and if you share this post with the expected guests of your own wedding, to get them to be the best they can be… Yeah. We are #AlwaysScheming )

Let’s begin!


First one, easiest one: RSVP you tool!!!

Ok, that might be a tad harsh, but this one is important dude! The soon-to-be-newlyweds have a lot of things to plan for when it comes to the ceremony and reception, and they need a headcount that reflects who’s actually coming.

Food, booze, seating, dancing room, all these things depend on just how many people are showing up, and for the most part, these things cost a set amount per person. Whether it is self-catered, or professionally done, they are going to pay up front, and it would be a tragedy if they were significantly short or over in how much they paid for. You can help avoid this by using the frickin’ card they included in the invitation (likely with a self-addressed return envelope.) It takes all of one minute to check the boxes on the card, drop it in the envelope, and drop the envelope in the mailbox. Show them that much respect, please!!!

… Why are you asking if this was written from personal experience? What have you heard? Who sent you?!? *Runs Away Crying*

Go Easy Slugger

Ok, moving on. You know how we just said the bride and groom must pay for all the food and drink ahead of time, based on an expected headcount? Yeah, that means they only have so much to go around.

Now don’t get us wrong: We aren’t saying you can’t have an extra scoop of potato salad, or more than one beer… Just, go easy on things, at least early on. Especially with the booze. Slow your roll, and make sure every guest has gotten their share of food, then swoop down on the leftovers. One piece of cake is a good start, unless they start asking people to take some home with them. Space out the drinks, which isn’t just courteous, it’s responsible. The bride and groom probably bought enough to have extra of everything, but you never know who showed up without listening to that first piece of advice we offered. Be a little conservative in your consumption, and help make sure everyone has enough to have fun.

Go Crazy, Yo!

On the flip side, there is no reason to be reserved when it comes to the party aspect of things. The bride and groom picked out the entertainment with all of you guests in mind, so they deserve the wildest and craziest fun you can offer.

Get out there and shake that booty as often as you can. Sing if the band/DJ allows it. Give a fun speech if you have the chance, even if it is short and from your table (yes, we are sure it is fine. We’ve already suggested you be a responsible drinker, so this won’t be a drunk-speech moment. Go for it!)

Point is this: This is meant to be a celebration, the party of their lives. It needs to be energetic, fun, and the stuff lifelong memories are made of. That is hard to accomplish when you are a bump on a log/potato in a chair. Cut loose and live it up for the night!

Wrangle Your Spawn

… Except, if you brought children with you. You might need a plan for them… Scratch that… You NEED to make a plan for them.

Yes, if your children happen to be the 1st degree niece/nephew/grandchild of the bride and/or groom, then they really should be there. Heck, they are probably IN the wedding to begin with. But if your kids don’t have any special name for the soon-to-be-weds, and call them by their actual name… It may be wise for them to sit this one out.

Sure, kids dancing is fun and adorable, but there will likely be a lot of adults around with several alcoholic beverages in their hands, so your little ones might get bored pretty quick. You can ask the wedding duo if they have any special entertainment plans for the younger crowd, but don’t be surprised if they don’t. There just aren’t many options to keep little ones content at a wedding reception. And if your childrenseses get rowdy when they get bored, it’s on you to keep them from breaking something expensive at the venue…

… Or like we said, let them sit this one out… It’s your call.

If You Are Going To Give, Give Smart

Look, we know it might be a little risqué to talk about what you should be giving as a wedding present… But there are a few ideas we need to put out there, because they might elevate your gift from “nice” to “FREAKING AWESOME”, without adding a penny to your price tag.

Case in point: Expensive does not always mean good. Neither does “whimsical,” or homemade. Just because you think it is an amazing idea, that doesn’t necessarily translate to the wedding couple. You might like that fancy whiskey serviette, with the crystal bottle and special glasses… But if the couple prefers beer, that thing will sit on a shelf as soon as they get it home.

Your best bet is one of two routes: If they have an actual registry, shop from that. It’s what they know they want/like/need, so it is impossible to go wrong there. Or, ask them if there are any wedding related tasks they need help with. If they are coming up short in the food and drink department, paying for a dish or two (or a few bottles of wine) will mean more than any present you can pick. See if they need help with decorating, or set-up. The wedding party may not be sufficient to handle it all, and any assistance you offer will be priceless.

… Or, you could go in on the groom’s Founder’s Line Ring. Seriously, how epic would it be for the groom’s friends and family to crowdsource his wedding band?

(Yeah, it was a shameless plug. But when have we ever had any shame?)

See you next time on the Manly Bands Blog!