Notes From Dad: That Time of Year

Holidays are almost here and with that comes excitement, happiness and stress. This sad realization is many marriages have a difficult time during the holidays. What causes this stress and how to deal with it will be featured in this article.

This time of year patience between spouses is fragile and can lead to an unhappy chain of events, such as, mood swings, depression and anxiety. Some triggers to look for and avoid.

Location-- Do you celebrate at home and prepare the meal. Do you visited hers or your parents? The mere logistics of Thanksgiving and Christmas and the challenge of finding ways to celebrate with two sets of parents and two extended families can be a challenge.

Expense--  Starting in late September, early October, we are inundated with Thanksgiving and Christmas reminders. The cost of entertaining and gift buying can create turmoil between even the happiest of couples.

Tradition-- Whose tradition will be followed?  Be careful here because this is where the hurt and stress can start to develop.

Work-- This time of year many are faces with great work pressures. Meeting deadlines, time away from families and that "can’t miss" holiday party. Remember family always need to come first. Try the following suggestions:

  1. Communicate-The holidays do not have to be a time of stress. Talking with each other about your feelings shows love, respect and caring for one another. The decisions you make should be beneficial for both of you.
  2. Plan ahead-- Set up a holiday fund so when the holidays are here you will be financially prepared and not have to worry about costs.
  3. Traditions-- As a new couple it is your time to create a tradition. It could be a mixture of hers and his or something brand new. Whatever you choose make it yours.

Finally, breathe. Your love, compassion and understanding for each other will empower you to celebrate the holidays with smiles and that warm glow of happiness.


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