Couples and Anger

Couples and Anger

In life, we sometimes lose our cool and release an emotion of anger. Anger may be responsible for many failed relationships; however, anger, when performed in a positive manner, can be used effectively when dealing with our emotions; this article will explore the facets of anger and hopefully offer alternative methods to bring happiness into your relationship.

Anger has three components;

• Silent aggression (passive aggression), which maybe the most difficult because it’s anger that has been stored, the second is open aggression, which may be physical and/or verbal and is usually done to gain control from your partner, and the third is self -assertive, which relates to one’s ability to handle anger in a healthy and confident atmosphere.

Let’s look at Silent aggression; this is a form of anger caused by the lack of communicating your hurt feelings, it can be a way of not being truthful with your partner. One way to confront this is; allow each other to calm down, make a sincere apology and agree to move forward. Be positive and don’t blame yourself, remember it takes two to argue.

The next one, open aggression is when your partner lashes out, and may become violent thru physical/verbal assault; it is a threat to you and your partner. Examples of this are bullying, sarcasm, accusing and screaming; in other words being out of control. Ways to confront this anger is to remove yourself from this moment, it may not be safe, second, contact agencies that offer help and support and if necessary, contact your local police.

The third is assertive aggression; being assertive is a highly form of communicating; it is based upon respect for each other, it shows that you are willing to work on resolving the conflict. This type of anger can be a positive one for it not only shows your willingness to accept criticism but also helps keep your emotions in check.

Finally, remember, any form of anger can hurt or help a relationship, however, remember the key to a healthy relationship is expressing your true feelings and wants.

Good Luck !!